Ronda Rousey (dot net!)

Currently Reading: The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
Currently Listening To: King Without A Crown (live at Stub’s) by Matisyahu

So I was at my mom’s house playing Zelda Ocarina of Time on Dennis’ wii (for a time period much longer than I would like to admit). And I don’t know if I mentioned this before, but after this Olympics I’ve had my mind set on getting into some kind of ocean search and rescue program; for either the Coast guard or Los Angeles Lifeguard Dpt. I met some gentlemen from the Coast Guard judo club while teaching a clinic in San Fransisco and they’d said they’d try to get me a tour.
Anyways, the phone rings while I’m in mid-zelda-mode – it was the coast guard guys saying that they’re trying to get me a tour of the base and in to do the swimming workout with the search and rescue people. At first I’m freaking out cause it’s a really exciting opportunity, but then I realize that - besides surfing - I haven’t gone swimming for an organized workout, since I was 17!
After considering this fact, I set out on a mission to go swimming as much as possible until then. The first necessity of this mission is to find a onepiece swimsuit. I looke all over my mom’s place and found nothing but bikinis - and I couldn’t be swimming laps in a bikini for the coast guard; I dunno that just sounds like the kind of thing that would be extremely frowned upon. So I ran out of the house, locked the door, and was off to Ross (dress for less!). I had to throw a couple things in my trunk and –
…
where are my?
CRAP!!!!
In case you haven’t guessed by now, I locked my keys in my trunk, while locked out of my mom’s house, with my spare keys locked in my Venice apartment 5 miles away, with my licensed to drive family members all in St. Louis, at 2pm in 90 degree weather, and wearing jeans. My only comfort was that mochi was sitting next to me, leash in hand, and not – god forbid- locked in the car too.

So the mission of the day slightly changed from a venture to Ross (dress for less!), to a Santa Monica -> Venice Hike ( I know I’m making it really dramatic, its just I’m a huge wuss when it comes to walking)

Via starbucks of course (my new obsession is a Venti Sweetened and Shaken Passion Iced Tea – god! I feel more refreshed just typing it!!)

Since Mochi burned her paws the last time we went on a long hike, (see previous blog entitled “And then I fell off a cliff”) I was trying to take the side streets and walk through parks – which is apparently impossible, these parks are like friggin labyrinths! Why is it necessary to have so many damn locked fences at 3 o’clock in the afternoon? Needless to say, me and Mochi were taking the long way there.

At sometime past four (I left at 2), surfer guy calls me up after getting off of work and offers to pick me up. He then came to my rescue and later drove me back to my place – okay, muuuch later, there were a few Coldstone’s Creamery and blockbuster distractions that could absolutely not be avoided.
Eventually I got dropped off at my place, and pulled the screen off an open window to break into my own apartment with the greatest of ease - and without anyone passing by looking twice. THAT’S WHY I HAVE A HUGE MEAN LOOKIN DOG!! What if I was a psycho serial killer?! At least ten people must have passed by without saying a word (But a logical explanation could be, I can’t say that the sight of legs dangling out my window after locking my keys in for the 1000th time is uncommon).
After unlocking the door and fixing my blinds, I realize my apartment has been taken over by a brigade of flies in my absence. I didn’t have any newspaper or anything to throw at them, so I started throwing DVD cases at them – which was surprisingly effective! Though I’m not sure if any onlooker that could have seen me break into the apartment, and start throwing dvds at the walls would agree.
With many of the flies still alive and buzzing I was looking around in my bathroom and found a big ol’ f*** off spider - Like as big as a quarter- sitting on my sink with what I would imagine was a big ol’ smile on his big ol’ spider face.
So I then resolved to herd all the flies into the bathroom and let the spiderzilla take care of the problem. So presently I’m lying on my bed, typing this and waiting for that little ecosystem to play itself out – its gunna be a little gross the next time I have to go in there to pee… but that problem will have to be dealt with when it comes.

And now its time for some pb&j.